Being a young man is difficult these days, but most of us try our best. Post college and pre marriage is a weird flux that makes a man seem like is life is in a constant whirlpool. It takes a very flexible piece of clothing to keep up with all of the changes in a man’s life during this time. An article of clothing that can be picked up off the floor, sniffed, and worn without another thought.
While the layman may look at a t-shirt and merely see a very simple piece of fabric with holes cut out of it for the arms and head. What they aren’t seeing are the multitude of uses the t-shirt fulfills for its owner. One of these uses is for a handy “working shirt”. The working shirt is typically put on when someone needs to wear something they don’t care about. A working shirt began its life as any other t-shirt, but an errant meatball or fallen glob of salsa has changed it into a handy t-shirt for painting in or doing outdoor chores.
Another type of t-shirt that can be observed is the “good” t-shirt. This is made example in the statement, “Oh, we’re going to the bar? Let me put on my good t-shirt.” This is usually the young male’s favorite, typically with a fairly humorous pun or image across the chest. Please note that this shirt can (and will) be worn for multiple days if it remains relatively salsa-free and the wearer has a supply of fabric-freshener on hand.
The last example of t-shirt we will examine is a very sad one, but necessary to display the varied uses these t-shirt can have. This last t-shirt is called the “always remember” shirt. Once or twice in the man’s past, a woman flitted through and then left again. While she was there, she marked her territory by wearing one of the young man’s t-shirts at night or during television time. This shirt will bear her scent, and the man will occasionally pull it out from its special place and weep into it privately. This is most often done after many shots of tequila.
If we were to delve deeper into this fictional man’s closet, we would find another dozen types of shirt that fill multiple roles. This should prove as ample proof that the t-shirt is no mere garment, but rather a tool. Just like our ancestor cavemen, our evolution continues as we grow older. Jeans give way to slacks, and t-shirts give way to shirts that can be worn with (dare I say it?) a tie. So the next time you buy an old tee at a second-hand shop for a dollar, think about how priceless that shirt was to the young man who wore it first.